It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize
