I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
