fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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