I like to think it a success when the cops are called
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
i will never coherently bang her
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
