If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
