Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
