my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
how drunk are you?
Several
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
