so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize