OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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