dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
