i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize