You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
