I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
