her vagine was all disorganized.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Randomize
