I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize
