Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
