dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I use my feet as sexual weapons
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
