im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
