I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I have fence marks all over my body
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
