Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Randomize
