At least make sure they are 18
Why
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
