Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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