im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
