My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
