I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
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