guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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