it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
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