My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
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