you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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