you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
