if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
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