dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Success! We fucked roommates!
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