All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
