I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
