So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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