I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
