Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
