Nicole vs. Life
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
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