Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
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