I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
