lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
