all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize