only if we run a train.
done.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Randomize
