I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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