Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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