It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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