so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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