R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Randomize