The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Randomize
