Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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